Saw this in one of my classes earlier this semester. Quite interesting!
Rewards as manipulations.
Pretty much the biggest thing I learned in this class is you can't change other people.
(But I'm studying therapy!)
Ahem. Pretty much you can only help facilitate environments in which others would be most willing to change of their own volition. Fine line. Cool stuff.
Worry about fixing yourself. Try to help others.
Trying to change others just gets them and you frustrated.
Wanna know what my excellent (and not-boring) textbooks were for this class?? :)
Why We Do What We Do (Edward Deci), Leadership and Self-Deception (Arbinger Institute), Anatomy of Peace (Arbinger Institue), The How of Happiness (Sonja Lyubormirsky), Learned Optimism (Martin Seligman).
Yep, I pretty much have the coolest major ever--love it :)
This video brings up autonomy (self-direction), mastery (getting better at something), and purpose (what gets you up in the morning).
Trusting people to rise up to an amazing potential gets yourself out of their way, and leads to crazy awesome results!
See people as people.
Life is good :)
PS
Random....but wanna hear about another study I learned about? I'll cite it if I find it...
Basically, some people think the more attractive you are, the happier you'll be.
Nope!
They had a bunch of people rate how attractive they thought they personally were, then they had a bunch of other people rate how attractive they thought each person was. (Don't worry, I don't think anyone got told their scores ha.)
The people that were considered attractive weren't happier than unattractive--the interesting finding:
People who thought they were attractive were happier. Even people that were unattractive or only decently attractive, but considered themselves attractive were happier than the good-looking people who didn't think they looked good.
Blind arrogance? I like to see it as self-assurance--people who are satisfied with what they've got are happier :)
We could all be skinnier/buffer/shorter/taller/whatever. We're all good in our ways. We just gotta believe it :)
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